Jess returns
by Wild Orphan
Summary: completed!
1. Default Chapter

This is just a story of Jess returning to Stars Hollow, because of the spin off show being cancelled I am hoping Jess will return, and this is what I would like to see happen.

I guess I am supposed to say that I don't own any of the characters from Gilmore Girls but that is a given. (Considering this is a fan site for fan fiction you get where I am going)

Ok so here is the first installment! Hope you enjoy! This is all Jess's POV

"You have to be shitting me!"

"Jess, come on"

"No, my god Jimmy, What am I going to do?"

"Listen you just have to leave for a while"

"Because you went and fucked up again"

"I didn't go and fuck up again"

"Please"

"It was just a minor disagreement"

"That has landed you in jail, again"

"Jess, your being a little unreasonable, I took you in gave you a home. I told you I wasn't the best person to be living with, but you didn't care -

"You said you had changed your life around'

"Yeah well things happen, the point is Sasha can't have you here its unfair to her-

"But not at all to me"

"Its unfair to her because we just imposed you into our lives, and she doesn't need to deal with you on her own, just live with a friend for a few months and then when I get out you can come back"

"Forget it"

"Jess"

"No! Give me a few days, I'll be out of your way then"

"Where you going to go?"

"Don't know, anywhere"

"Jess just think of it from my point of view"

"Id rather not, I'm going out, see you later"

"Where are you going?"

But it was to late Jess had already stormed out of the house. He stopped down on the boardwalk and sat on a bench. What am I going to do? Shit! He had been here 5 months; things had gotten off to a rocky start but eventually they got into a routine. Him and Sasha weren't all that close, hell even Jimmy and him were distant, but that was to be expected, you didn't just bond immediately with your father that your meeting for the first time. Lily was the only one he was comfortable around. She was a weird kid, but she loved to read, and listened to him when he made suggestions on reading material. Hemmingway even became her knew favourite author. He was going to miss that kid. 

After a few hours he got up and went back to the house, and started to pack, he really only had one option of where to go, well he had two, but he wasn't going back there, not after all that.

(2 days later)

"Where are you going"

"New York"

"Oh"

"Yep"

"Well uh listen Jess, I know things didn't turn out to well, but it doesn't mean that I don't want to be in your life, now that I know you so, what I'm trying to say is keep in touch, you don't have to call every weekend or anything but occasionally to talk and you know so I can know what your up to and stuff. Okay?

"Okay"

"Do you mean it?"

"Yeah Jimmy, I'll call and we can discuss our experiences of when we were in jail"

"Jess"

"Relax, I'll call you"

"Good"

"This is my bus, so I'll see you, thanks for letting me crash"

"Don't mention it, Take care"

"As always"

With that Jess got on to the bus, nodded goodbye and went to sit at the back. He pulled out a book, and read for the trip back to New York.

That was the first chapter, what do you think?


	2. no choice

As the bus pulled into the stop Jess stood up and sighed, oh how he didn't want to be here. He grabbed his bag and started to walk aimlessly around the streets. It was so familiar yet so different from before. Everything was the same but everything had changed. Or maybe it was he who had changed. He knew that he had grown up a lot in the past months. He knew that he was a screw up he had realized all his mistakes, he didn't want to be that person anymore but it was hard to break old habits. He was trying, in California he was able to take a few courses to get his diploma; he finished quickly not needing to take another year at high school. 

He shook his head clearing them of all thoughts. He headed towards his old apartment, taking in the streets of his old neighbourhood. A smirk played around his lips as he saw some of his old friends. He headed towards them, but suddenly stopped, he didn't want to see them he didn't want to fall into the pattern again. He turned back and kept walking. It was close to nine when he got to his apartment. He realized he didn't have a key so he was going to have to get buzzed in. he went to push his apartment buzzer when he saw the name next to it. M. Chase, apartment 17. That wasn't his mom, maybe it was some guy she was seeing. He pushed the button.

"Hello"

" Ah my name is Jess, Jess Mariano, umm I used to live here is Liz there by any chance?"

"Liz? No she moved out like three months ago"

"OhDo you know where she went?"

" Nope"

"Right umm can you buzz me in I have to talk to Frank"

"Yeah sure hold on"

"Thanks"

The door opened and Jess walked into the dimly lit hallway. He walked right to the back to Frank's office. He hesitated then knocked. "Come in" He opened the door.

"Jess, haven't seen you in a while, a year really"

"Yeah I moved"

"So why are you here?"

"I was actually wondering if you know where my mom is, she doesn't seem to be in our apartment, they said she moved"

"Yeah bout three months back"

"Did she say where she was going, leave an address or number or anything"

"No she said nothing"

Jess was trying hard not to panic or look worried at the moment but it was hard, where was he going to stay?

"Shit"

"Listen Jess do you need some where to stay the night?"

"Yeah is that alright?"

"Couch is there"

"Thanks"

"I'll go look just incase Liz did leave something"

He nodded. Oh shit. How could she do this to him? Her friends probably know where she is. He would just have to ask them. Luke may know, but he didn't want to go back. He shook the thought of Luke out of his mind, he had fucked up to much there to impose himself on Luke again, he couldn't do it. Just then Frank came back confirming that Liz had left nothing. He sighed lay down and picked up a book. Frank shook his head sadly, poor kid he thought.

The next morning Jess went in search of his mom or her friends. He went to the places she hung out, or occasionally worked. There was no sign of her anywhere and none of her friends had heard from her in a couple of weeks.

"Sorry doll, she's off with her latest fling, haven't talked to her in a month, she didn't give us a number or anything"

"Oh well, listen Connie if you talk to her get the number, tell her that I'm looking for her and that she should call me, but she probably wont, so uh here is the number where I'll be if you talk to her can you call me, let me know where she is Please"

"Sure thing"

"I'll see you, don't lose that number, I really need to talk to her"

"I wont, don't worry"

He gave a slight smile and nod before he left the restaurant. Guess he had no choice but to go to Luke. He could crash with one of his buddies, but he knew where that would get him and he was trying to get as far away from that. He had very little money so he couldn't stay in New York. Ugh what the hell this certainly wasn't going the way it was intended to. He would go back to Frank stay one more night, then it seemed he would be going back to Stars Hollow. Oh shit he thought.


	3. A confrontation

The bus pulled up to the stop. He stepped off and had to stifle a snort of laughter. He didn't know what he had expected. Nothing had changed it was still a cheery All-American town. Thanksgiving decorations were being replaced by Christmas ones. He looked slowly around town thinking that this was just like the first time he came here. He shook his head again, grabbed his bag and started I in the direction of the diner when he stopped suddenly. Oh god not now, he watched her stop. Her jaw dropped slightly as she looked at him. Just my luck that the first person he would see was the one he most wanted to avoid.

'Jess, what, why are, what are you doing here?'

'Nothin'

'Jess'

'What'

'You can't do this, you left, things were back to normal, I was fine I was moving on, things were good, you can't just keep showing out of the blue, you can't come back here and expect me to forget all that happened'

'Jeez, you really need to get over yourself''

'Excuse me'

'Just because I came back here for you once does not mean that I've done it again, had it ever crossed your mind that I had no choice-

'Jess I -

'I mean really, I guess you never thought that my dad would be an even bigger fuck up than me, huh and my mom well it is just like her to pick up and move leaving no address or number no way for me to contact her so I had to come back here, that last place on earth I want to be but I have no money and no place to go so here I am. Only to be told that I can't come back and ruin your perfect little existence, don't get me wrong I'm glad your good, really I'm happy even if I don't show it but I've got a few other things on my mind at the moment, so if you'll excuse me.'

'Jess, I'm sorry I didn't-

'Forget it'

He walked off leaving her standing there looking lost. Figures his presence here had already caused a confrontation. He hadn't meant to yell at her, it had just come out, he had held in all his frustration since his dad had told him to leave and she was just standing there thinking he had come back for her. He shook his head to clear his thoughts.

He was looking in the diner. He could see Luke behind the counter. He wasn't sure if he should bring his bag inside, maybe he would leave it outside, but knowing Stars Hollow that would probably be breaking some sort of law. Just then Luke went in the kitchen so he took his chance. He walked in and put his bag at the foot of the stairs and went back and stood in front of the counter. Luke came out of the kitchen with a couple of plates, saw Jess, turned and yelled 'Caesar' Caesar poked his head out and looked at Jess nodded took the plates and said 'I got it covered'

Luke didn't even look at Jess as he walked to go upstairs. He saw the bag at the foot of the stairs, and picked it up continuing on his way. They got into the apartment Luke put the bag down and turned it looked as though he was going to say something but before he could Jess cut him off.

'Listen, I know this is sudden, and selfish of me but I really need somewhere to stay for a couple of weeks, unless you know where my mom is?'

'I don't know, at home I would assume'

'That's what I thought but it seems that she has moved, without telling any one where she has gone. I've left messages with her friends so when they hear from her they are going to contact me, and then I can get outa you way'

'You don't have to'

'Yeah, I do'

Luke looked at Jess for a moment before asking 'What happened to Jimmy"

Jess laughed and shook his head. 'Turns out that Jimmy is an unfit parent, he got himself into some trouble, he's back in a cell'

'What he do?'

'Got in a fight, causing bodily harm, severe bodily harm, leaving me no choice but to leave. Believe me when I say that I wouldn't be here if I had anywhere else to go. I don't want to impose my self on you, especially after all the shit I put you through. I'm not proud of what I did to you, I'm not proud of who I am, but I just need a place to sleep.'

'Don't worry about it Jess, stay as long as you need, indefinitely, if you want'

'I couldn't do that to you'

'Sure you can, your family, not only that, but I still got all your stuff'

'You do'

'Yeah, I mean I didn't know where Jimmy was, I thought you might call or write for it but you didn't-'

'Sorry'

'Don't mention it, I called Liz but she just told me to put it in storage, she said she had no where to put it'

'So where is it all?'

'In your room'

'You didn't clean it out' he walked over and looked in his room, it was the exact same as he had left it five months ago, 'Why?'

'In case you moved back I guess. Listen Jess, I've meaning to apologize about-'

'Don't apologize you did nothing wrong'

'No I think I did, I never meant to force you to leave, I know I said that you had to go, but I didn't mean it, I was just angry and disappointed, I didn't really want you to go.'

'It wasn't your fault, I put you through shit, I had to figure some things out on my own. Like my dad I had to go be with him for a while to see if it could work. While I was there I discovered that I am exactly like him, I don't want to be like him, I don't want to be that in twenty years. You did nothing but try and help me and I just threw it back in your face. If I hadn't left I probably wouldn't be going anywhere; I would still be that punk ass little shit who didn't give a damn about anyone or anything. It was my fault, and after all I did to you, you can still stand there and take me back in.'

'Your family, you help family out'

'Well thanks, I appreciate it more then you know'

Luke stood there looking oddly at Jess, 'If you don't mind me asking, what are you going to do about getting your high school diploma?'

'I got it'

'Huh'

'It seems that in Venice the rules are a little more relaxed, I just had to take a few courses over the summer, it took me three months instead of a year to get it,'

'You got your diploma?'

'That I did' he smirked it looked like Luke was about to dance or something, instead he pulled him into a one arm hug, 'well I'm proud of you'

'Ah don't get all sentimental on me, I don't think I could take it'

'Shut up it won't happen again'

'Good'

Luke nodded and smiled 'Well I better get back downstairs, you can unpack or whatever'

'I'll come down and help in a bit'

He nodded again, and left. Jess looked around the room. He sighed, that went better then expected. He thought Luke was going to yell and scream at him, he hadn't expected him to be so understanding. He definitely didn't expect him to let him stay 'indefinitely' but he wouldn't. He couldn't stay here. He would be here a week maybe, a few months at the most, but at least he knew that he could come back here if he ever needed a place to crash. He looked around his room again, picked a book off the shelf and sat down to read.

So that was chapter 3 what did you think?


	4. Authors Note

This is just a quick authors note, I know I always get mad cause you think a new chapter is up, but its just the author rambling about something or other. So what I wanted to say was thank you to Smile, who informed me that I only accepted signed reviews, I had no idea so I went and fixed that, if others want to review fell free to do so now. I know that I made Jess to seem a little harsh, but that's what I want. I mean Jess really is not the nicest guy, and I wanted to show that. I didn't want this story to be Jess comes home and him and Rory forgive and forget run into each others arms and kiss. I'm not even sure if I will put them together after all that happened last season, I mean I don't like the way the relationship went, and I don't know if it can really be put back together, to much happened. So that was a big ramble, I might update today or tomorrow not sure yet. Oh yeah and since today is July 8th I just thought I would say happy birthday to Milo I know he is not here and wont read this but still, it is his birthday so he deserves some wishes!!!

Okay so that is all I had to stay, stay tuned for another update!

Tegan


	5. your business is everyones business

A couple hours later Jess made his way downstairs to help Luke. Threw the curtain he heard Lorelai and stopped. He wasn't sure if he should just walk out and say 'hey, I'm back!' So he stood there and waited for a minute. He realized suddenly that they were talking about him. He listened closer.

'What do you mean he is back, Luke, why did you take him back? After all he did to you and the town, you're letting him stay? Are you insane?'

'Listen he is family, I've said it before and I will say it again you don't turn your back on family no matter what.'

'I know you're a good guy, but can you really handle him again? I mean what did he do this time, why is he here. Is he on the run from cops is he in trouble?

'No, and don't take this the wrong way, but whatever reasons I have for taking him in are my own, and further more whatever reasons he has for being here are his own, so don't yell, or nag or do anything to him, okay? Please.

'Fine' she got a look from Luke 'I swear I won't bother the kid'

'Thank you'

Jess had heard enough so he walked out in to the diner, looking like he hadn't heard a thing and he was just coming down the stairs. He appreciated Luke telling Lorelai that it wasn't her business, he didn't really need her yelling at him.

'Jess'

'Hello, Lorelai'

'How are you?'

'Could be better, you?

'Same as you'

'Imagine that'

'Luke, need any help?'

'Take these' handing him plates 'to that table over there'

Jess nodded and left.

'Well I see his manners have improved slightly, still has the attitude.' Luke gave her another look, 'Sorry'

She watched him for a few minutes, then realized the time. 'Rory was going to meet me here half an hour ago, I wonder what could have tied her up, she doesn't have classes today so she is normally here.' She was talking to no one in particular but both Luke and Jess looked up. Luke replied 'I'm sure she is just caught up in school work'

'Convenient'

They both looked at Jess.

'Excuse me'

'Nothing'

'No there was meaning behind the way you said that, as if she is purposely not here'

'Well she is purposely not here'

'I don't understand'

'I ran into her when I got off the bus today, she will be avoiding the diner for a few days, because she is not sure what to make of my being back, if you want I can give you a cup of coffee to go because I know you are dying to go back and talk to her now' he poured her a cup, smiled and nodded and than went to take a customer's order.

'He saw Rory? Did you know this?'

'No, but it does explain why she is not here'

'Right so I am going to go home, to see her'

'See you later'

'Bye'

She left with a look at Jess, Luke was watching Jess with curiosity. He wasn't sure why he allowed Jess to stay. Maybe because he looked so lost. He had sounded sincere when he apologized, and it seemed that he had grown up a bit in the past few months. He wondered what was going through his mind. 

'Jess, can you go to the market I need you to get some things'

'Yep, what do you need?'

Luke handed him a list. 'Thanks'

'No problem'

He stepped outside and walked over to Doose's. As soon as he got inside he wished he hadn't. Lorelai was in there buying some poptarts; he tried to walk by without her seeing him but no such luck.

'Jess, I know I told Luke I wouldn't bother you but I just can't help it. You have some nerve coming back here and disrupting everyone's life again, things were good, people were getting into a routine you-'

'By everyone and people you mean Rory don't you, I've already had this pleasant conversation with her, and as much as the two of you want to believe that I came back for her I'm sorry to disappoint but I didn't, before you make accusations why don't you get the full story.'

He walked away, but he could tell she was still watching him. Oh god, why am I here? I'm just going to get these looks from everyone in town, jeez I've been here a day and already I need to get out. I don't think I can handle people accusing me of things anymore. I shouldn't have come back. Another voice popped in his head telling him he had no choice what else was he going to do sleep on a park bench? He didn't think so. He got the stuff Luke needed and went back to the diner trying to ignore the stare he got from Taylor, Ms. Patty and other town members who were now aware of his being back. By tomorrow the whole town would know. He felt bad for Luke, he was going to get in a few confrontations about why he was back. Why couldn't this town just leave well enough alone and mind their own business? He shook his head, Because he said to him self it is Stars Hollow.


	6. She means to much to get close

It had been a week since he got back to Stars Hollow. Things had set into a routine. At 8:00 he was up and working in the diner, he had a 15 minute break at 10:15, he had lunch for an hour at 12:30, and worked until 5:00 with another break at 3:30. Every other night he closed the diner. He had kept his head down, been considerably polite to all customers, he didn't argue with Luke, he just accepted that while he was here he wasn't going to be trouble for anyone.

Lorelai had come into the diner regularly, but he avoided her and let Luke take her orders. He didn't want to have to talk to her. Rory still hadn't come in, he was glad he didn't have to see her, it would just make it worse. He was still waiting for a call from Connie or Liz, any day know he thought. Please.

He was sitting behind the counter, there were three people in the diner and they all seemed fairly comfortable. Luke was going over a supply list when the bell jingled announcing someone's arrival. The bell however need not have rang because before the door was open all the way you could hear Lorelai telling Rory a ridiculous story about a dream she had where her clothes were strangling her. They came to the counter, and since Luke was fairly caught up in what he was doing it looked like it would be he who would serve them.

'Hey can we get two coffees, one to go and-'

'A chocolate donut'

He nodded, he hadn't looked at her yet, but as she reached for her coffee their eyes met briefly, she smiled but he just handed the donut to her and stated 'Anything else?'

'No'

'K mom I gotta get to class, I'll see you tonight, around 7:00'

'Meet you for dinner?'

'Yeah'

'Here?'

'Sure, see you later, have a good day'

'Bye hun'

She left and Lorelai sat in silence for a while. Luke had got up and was in the storeroom muttering to himself about what he needed. Jess could tell that she was watching him, he looked up.

'Can I get you something?'

'What! Oh no'

She fell silent again, then,

'Jess, I just wanted to apologize for snapping at you the other day. I didn't know the whole story and I guess I was mad at you for leaving, and I shouldn't have accused you of your intentions or reasons for being back here, so I'm sorry'

'Don't worry about it, I would've done the same if it were me, considering my past choices'

'Oh right' she seemed taken back at his reply 'Ok well um thanks so how long are you staying?'

'Don't know, when my mom calls I'll be gone, but who knows how long that will take'

'Right'

They sat in silence for a few more minutes. Luke had come back in the room at some point.

'Well I better go, so see you two later'

'Bye'

Jess just nodded and went back to reading. Luke turned to Jess, 'She snapped at you?'

'Mmhm'

'I told her not to' he sounded annoyed

'Well she usually does things she wants, besides she had to get it out of her system I suppose she has been wanting to do that ever since I left. It was no big deal'

'Was it bad?'

'No' he laughed 'I cut her off before she could rant for hours about me'

'You weren't rude were you?'

'I probably was, it doesn't matter'

'Did you tell her why you are here?'

'No, I assume her and Rory talked about it'

'How does Rory know?'

'I talked to her the first day I got back. Remember?

'You told her?'

'No I kinda yelled a bit, told her to get over her self and in the process told her why I was here. I wasn't my usual charming self'

'Huh, so you were worse then usual'

'Oh yeah, I was a dick'

'Have you apologized?'

'No'

'Are you going to?'

'Probably not, I mean I don't know how often I will see her. She's avoiding me, I'm avoiding her, I don't know how long I will be here, so what's the point?'

'Because you care about her and she cares about you'

'Huh, I thought that was the reason not to make up, it would just make it difficult again' he looked at his watch 'I'm going on break'

He got up and walked out of the diner. Leaving Luke looking very surprised.


	7. A note

Another couple weeks had passed. His mother hadn't called and neither had Connie. He was starting to feel frustrated. Rory had been coming in daily, and kept trying to make conversation, but he thought it was best if he stayed away, didn't get too close, that was the last thing either of them needed. It was Thursday afternoon, he had been back long enough to learn when people came in. He was expecting her in 5 minutes. This was when he usually got up to leave so he wasn't here when she came. But today the phone rang keeping him here so that when he hung up she was at a table. He couldn't just leave now. Stupid people confirming an order that Luke had placed. He walked over to her table.

'What can I get you?'

'Don't you know me well enough to not have to ask?'

'I suppose so, but it's polite to ask rather then assume'

'Jess, I said I was sorry, come on don't be like this, why can't we just talk like we used to?'

'Things change' he went to get her coffee. It was funny because he hadn't meant for that sentence to have a double meaning. He hadn't even been thinking about that. He laughed to himself, well she had always took the under lying meanings to everything he said to her. I guess things didn't change all that much.

Half an hour later Lorelai came in and started talking avidly to Rory. He didn't here any of their conversation until he went to take the order from the people at the table behind them.

'So he's not talking to you? I don't get it. Why not?'

'I don't know, he's been avoiding me ever since he got back. Maybe it's because of what I said to him, but I apologized. I don't know what else to do'

'I don't think you can do anything. I mean he doesn't plan on staying, s o maybe he doesn't want to get into close just to leave again.'

'Possibly, I just wish he would talk to me. He's changed a lot, I just want to know what happened'

'He's changed? I haven't noticed.'

'You wouldn't, you weren't close to him, it's in his eyes, he looks, I don't know lost or something'

'Well maybe you should try again.'

'Yeah' she looked at him as she said this, he was waling back to the counter, acting as though he was completely unaware of what he just heard.

A few minutes later the Gilmore's left. He went to clean their table when he found a note written on a napkin, to him from Rory. It read: Please come to the bridge @ 9:30, I _really_ want to talk to you. R.

He sighed and continued to clean the table.

Will he go?!?!


	8. the confession

It was 7:00 and he still hadn't decided if he was going to go to the bridge. He really didn't want to go he figured if he talked to her, all the feelings that he had pushed deep down would re surface. He didn't need that; he needed to move on. He couldn't force his problems on her, he couldn't let her back in, it would tare him apart. So he decided that he would write her a letter, and go early and put it on the bridge where she would see it. He sat down and got a pen and paper and wrote.

__

Rory

I'm not sure what to say to you. I don't know why you want to talk to me, after all I did to you. I know I was a real jerk to you and I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I left you without saying goodbye. I never told you what caused me to leave, even if you have heard it from someone else I think you deserve to hear it from me.

I told you a long time ago that I knew I wasn't going to collage so why try in high school. I didn't care, I have never cared. When I started dating you I promised my self that I would try, that I wouldn't let you down. But that's not me, I have always let the people closest to me down. I pushed myself away from my mother. I was always a problem for her, a disappointment. She never wanted me, so I pushed and let myself believe I didn't care about her. I got in some trouble and got sent here. That's when I met you.

The conditions for my staying at Luke's was that I would stay out of trouble and that I would graduate. I know it may not seem like it, but I like Luke. He was the first person who ever tried to set me on the right path, he kept me out of trouble for the most part. I think he really was the first one to care. Then there was you. You were the best thing that ever happened to me, and I lost you. I came into your life and caused problems for you and Dean and you and your mom. I turned your life upside down, or so I thought. It was really my life that I turned upside down. You made me want to be something. But wanting and doing are two different things. I was so set in my ways, that I couldn't change. You let me in, and I just pushed you out. I have never been good at relationships, all previous ones were purely sexual. With you it was different. I did not know how to deal, you were special, you tried to help me, but I wouldn't let you in to me. I was afraid that once you got to really know me, you would be disappointed at what you saw. I was just a scared angry little boy hiding and mad at the world. I didn't graduate, I would have to redo the 12th grade.

But then out of nowhere and with no warning, Jimmy came. He's my dad. I had never known him, he ran when I was born, couldn't handle his mistakes. I saw this as my opportunity/ I had let down both you and Luke, and now I could escape. I ran. I ran from my problems just like Liz, just like Jimmy. I followed their influence, not Luke's or yours. I couldn't bear to stay and see the disappointment in Luke's eyes he had trusted me to do well. But worse I couldn't face you. You have so much going for you, you had faith in me. I ran from you because of that. I never meant to hurt you, it was the last thing I wanted. But its natural for me, I push those who get to close. I haven't talked to you, because I don't want to hurt you again. But more I don't want to hurt myself. I will be leaving and I just can't do it all over again.

That's why I can't meet you. Don't ever blame your self for me leaving, it was never your fault. Please just except what I have said, don't try and talk to me. I have said all that I need to, to make you understand. I will never forget you Rory Gilmore. You will succeed in whatever you do. Just smile knowing that you changed my world.

Jess

Two hours later, he wiped his desk clear of crumpled up pieces of paper, put the letter in an envelope, and grabbed tape and his coat. He got to the bridge just after nine. She wasn't there. He walked to the middle and placed the letter down and taped it. He looked around and walked away. But he didn't go far. He stood in the shadows of a tree and watched her come. At first it looked as though she didn't see the letter. But then she slowly sat down and picked it up. He watched her carefully open it, and look around, then back at the paper. She started crying softly. She read it over a couple of times, all the while crying. He sighed and made his way back to Luke's Diner.


	9. The long awaited phone call

The next morning was fairly slow. Jess again just sat behind the counter reading. Lorelia and Rory both came in for their breakfast. Luke was busy, so it was Jess who again took their orders. As he handed Rory her coffee, she looked at him and whispered 'thank you'. He knew it wasn't for the coffee but for his letter. He nodded. She left to go to class, and he settled back down to his book. Luke and Lorelia started to talk but in very low voices, which made Jess assume they were talking about him. Luke cleared his throat and started to talk at a normal level.

'How is Rory handling all her schoolwork? She isn't in here as often any more.'

'Oh she's ok. I thought she spent a crazy amount of time studying when she was at Chilton but it was nothing compared to this. She has exams coming up before Christmas break, so she is confined in her room constantly.

'Stressful'

'Oh yeah like you wouldn't believe. She gets so cranky when I interrupt her'

'Which isn't often I hope'

'Oh no I wouldn't do it more then twice a day!'

'Oh well that's fine' he replied sarcastically 

She stuck her tongue out at him. 'Although she has been distracted by something else lately, I wonder what it could be' she looked at Jess pointedly when she said that.

He glanced up at her, raised his eyebrows and shook his head, then went back to her book.

'But I actually am worried about her. She's been putting a lot of pressure on herself lately, and last night she disappeared for an hour then came back all flustered and upset. Jess do you know why that is?'

'Nope"

'Are you sure? She said something about wanting to see you.'

'Well she didn't'

'But-'

'Can we not do this, it's not going to change anything, so why not drop it.'

'Fine' she looked at him for a few more seconds then went back to talking to Luke. She could be so irritating some times. 

( later that day)

The diner was packed. The usual dinner rush had come in and they were happily eating. Jess was behind the counter and Luke was giving a table some refills. The phone rang.

'Jess can you get that?'

'He got off his stool and went to the phone. 'Luke's Diner'

'Jess' 

He looked around the diner and turned his back on the people sitting.

'Liz, where have you been?'

'Around'

'You moved without telling any one where you went'

'Didn't realize I had to. Connie said something about you needing to talk to me. So what do you want, and can you make it short I got some where to be'

'I want to move back so if you could give me your address I could be there in a couple of days' as he said this he was getting a pen and paper.

'Who say's I'm going to let you come back'

'What' he was shocked

'I don't want you back here'

'Liz, I got to come back'

'Well I don't have to let you'

'Yes you do'

'Say's who?'

'Say's who? Say's me' his voice was raising, 'Say's the law, you can't abandon me'

'I didn't abandon you, you left me here all alone to go and live with Luke!'

'I didn't leave you!' He was yelling now, ' You sent me away cause I was to much for you to handle cause you were always stoned and drunk and out partying so don't blame your problems on me'

'Well that's all the more reason for you to not come back'

'All I need is a place to sleep, I will sleep on the couch if I have to, or is that where you do business?' he was being stared at but he didn't notice.

'Shut up you ungrateful little bastard, I don't want you, you ruined my life, I I hate you!'

'Your delusional you know that. Are you hard up, need another hit, is that where your going now?'

'Oh that's right and your all high and mighty. If I recall wasn't it you who got caught up in all that shit with-'

'Shut up' The whole diner was silent now and staring in shock at Jess.

'Don't tell me to shut up. I'm through with you, forget it, I'm leaving now goodbye.'

'Liz DON'T hand up, LIZ don't FUCKING HANG UP!'

He slammed the phone down and punched the wall. He turned around. He was breathing heavily. He took in the shocked and scared expressions on the people's faces. Luke reached out and tried to talk to him, but he pushed past him and stormed out of the diner, nearly knocking over Rory who had stood up.

He knew that that was the wrong way to deal with his mother but she was just so frustrating. She had sounded drunk on the phone. He would give her a few days to cool down. He would call Connie and get her number, she probably had it now. Then he would just show up at her place, she would have to take him then.

He sat down on the bridge wishing he had a smoke. He was sitting there less then five minutes when he heard footsteps. He sighed, he knew who it was before he looked up.

Ok! So I had a difficult time writing this chapter. You know when you can see it all in your head and its perfect, but the second you try and put it on paper it gets confusing and all messed up. Well that happened here. I re wrote the phone call three times. I'm still not completely satisfied with it, but it'll have to do. Tell me what you think!


	10. Stop bieng so afraid

He looked at her, 'Rory, go away'

'No'

'Rory, go away' he said it very firmly, as though there was no arguing with it.

'No'

She sat down next to him. He gave her an exasperated look and turned back to staring at the lake. She followed his lead and sat in silence. They sat that way for twenty or so minutes, before he said quietly almost to himself 'I'm still going back'

'Are you?'

'Yeah'

'Why'

He looked at her questioning face, 'Because I have to'

'Why'

He shook his head slightly; she still didn't get it.

'I don't belong here'

'You know, you keep saying that, but somehow I just don't believe you, and I don't think you believe it either'

'You don't get it'

'Then explain it to me. You don't belong here. But you do belong somewhere where people are constantly partying, where no one gives a damn about you or what you do. You don't belong here, but you belong somewhere, where you are just going to get caught up in drugs, where you are just going to drift and live no real life. I don't think you belong there.

He looked at her, she was angry.

'I mean, really Jess, you said you ran away, and here you are running away again. You said it yourself; it's not going to get you anywhere. So why run? Stay. You have people who care about you here, you have somewhere to live, you have a future. Don't shake your head at me, you know it as much as I do. So why are you running?'

'Rory just stop'

'Why? Cause you can't face the truth?'

He stood up suddenly and yelled 'Can't you see it is killing me to stay here?'

She was up to and yelled right back at him. 'It's only killing you cause you are letting it kill you. Get over it Jess, look at what you have, you can do better. Stop being so damn afraid and just let us in!'

With that she walked away. He sat back down, left alone with his thoughts. She was right, he knew she was right. But he just didn't think he could do it.

He got back late that night. Luke was up waiting for him. He started to walk past saying something about not wanting to talk. But Luke grabbed him and pushed him into a chair.

'Sit' he started to get up, 'Stay'

He sat back down.

'Right I don't know what happened earlier but I do know that I missed having you around, as crazy as that seems it's the truth. I also know that I want you to stay. I can't force you to stay but I can ask.' He looked at Jess, 'Stay'

He shook his head, 'I'll think about it' he got up and headed for his room.

'Jess' 

He turned and looked back.

'Really think about it'

He nodded, when he got to his room he flopped down on his bead and shut his eyes tight and placed his hands over his face. 'Arrrgh'


	11. This is right

He woke up, it was 10:47. Luke had let him sleep in. That was unusual. The events of the day before came back into his memory. He closed his eyes again. Oh god what was he going to do? He got up and had a shower and headed downstairs. He kept replaying everything that Rory, his mom and Luke said to him. If truth be told he didn't really want to live with his mom. She was a nut case. The only reason he had been so determined to go back there was that he figured it would be to hard on him and Luke and even Rory he guessed. But they seemed to be more stable then he was. He hadn't wanted to admit it but this was the only place he really felt comfortable, he was just himself. In New York he had to fit in so he did stuff he wouldn't normally do. With his dad he was always trying to impress him, or at least show him that he was okay. He didn't know why he bothered.

As he stepped into the Diner he looked around for Luke he was behind the counter.

'Its pretty slow, so you can have the day off, go think and stuff'

'Thanks'

He went to the bridge. He nodded to himself as he sat down. He looked around and smirked as memories flashed through his mind. The Picnic, after the car crash, Luke pushing him in, finding her here after the dance marathon, that stupid bloody swan, yesterday. He smiled. A few hours passed and he got up to go back to Luke's.

As he walked through the town he was looking at everything, taking it all in again. There were kids playing in the street and in the gazebo. Ms. Patty was teaching dance classes, the kids looked completely lost. Taylor was yelling at Kirk for jay walking. There was a parent and her child walking down the street wearing matching outfits. He shook his head. He turned to the diner. It was the only building not decorated for the holidays. He walked in. Luke was yelling at Lorelia for getting her own coffee, Rory was laughing. He walked around the counter and picked up the coffee and went to serve a customer. As he came back and looked at the scenes around him he smiled and nodded. Rory looked at him curiously. He shook his head as to say don't worry about it. Yes he thought. He had made the right choice.

Okay that was the end of this story. I know this chapter was short but it was really just wrapping it all up. I want to continue this story, but I didn't want to make this longer. This was just about Jess returning to Stars Hollow, so I figure I will do a sequel, I already have some ideas for it and am working on the first chapter, so look for that soon. Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I appreciate it. Hope you enjoyed it.

Later. Tegan


	12. note from me to you

Okay so I have changed my mind. I'm not going to do a sequel I'm just going to continue from here. I actually had the last chapter ready to post last Thursday, but then fanfiction wouldn't work for me I kept getting a connection failure, anyway, I know that chapter was super short, I didn't realize that until it went in to the format, I had already started the sequel, but it was set like 6 months in the future, so I'm just going to start from where I left off then I will incorporate what I have already written into later chapters. I think that is it so I'm now going to have to think about how to continue. If you have any ideas let me know

I will try to post as soon as I can.

Tegan


	13. You shouldn't have

Later that night Jess was sitting on the couch reading when Luke came into the apartment. He glanced up; Luke was standing there looking as though he was trying to figure out how to start the conversation. He decided to start it.

'Sorry about yesterday, I didn't mean to cause such a scene.'

'Well when talking to Liz it's kinda hard to keep your cool. When she told me she was sending you I had a similar conversation, minus the profanities and I think I hung up on her. I couldn't believe she was being so selfish.'

'Well that's Lizzie for you, only ever thinking of herself.'

There was silence then Luke asked what he really wanted to know. 'What are you going to do?'

He looked at Luke, then looked around the apartment, he opened his mouth to speak.

'Good'

'You didn't even know what I was going to say'

'Yes I did'

'You were that confident that I was going to stay?'

'Yep'

'How? I didn't even know until this afternoon'

'Yes you did, you just didn't want to admit it, you wanted to stay, but couldn't stay because you wanted to stay'

'That makes no sense'

'Yes it does'

'Whatever, you're confusing me. Your not going to rub this in my face are you?'

'Every now and then maybe'

'Perfect'

'Isn't it just'

They smiled at each other for a moment.

'Right I'm going to go close up the diner'

'I'll be right here'

Luke left and he sat back down on the couch. He was trying to figure out if he should tell Rory that he was staying or just let her figure it out for herself. There was a knock on the door and she walked in. 'Luke said I should come up'

'Oh'

'Can I come in?'

'Huh, oh yeah come on in'

'So is Luke happy for a reason'

'I suppose so'

'Well'

'What'

'Jess' she walked closer to him

'Rory' he mocked her

'Are you staying?' she was only a couple of feet away from him

He looked at her. He could see the anticipation in her eyes.

'It looks that way'

She broke out into a huge grin and bit her lip. He looked down. He could feel her inch closer to him. She was right in front of him now. Don't do it he thought. He felt her hand go round his neck and then her lips were on his. Oh how it felt so good to have her again. She backed him into a wall. He put his hands on her waist. She deepened the kiss, her hands were running through his hair.

Suddenly he pushed her away.

'No' he shook his head. 'Don't do that, it's not right'

He looked at her. She was backing up, it looked like she was about to cry. 'I'm not staying for that, Rory, please we can't, I can't go through that again'

She had started to cry. 'Jess I-'

'Try and understand Rory'

She shook her head and turned around and ran out of the diner. He sat back down on the couch and put his head in his hands.

The door flung open again

'What did you do to her?'

'Nothing'

'Jess, she just ran out of the diner crying, that is not nothing'

'She kissed me and I told her to stop-'

'You told her to stop? Why would you do that?

He looked up shocked at what Luke just said. 'What'

'Why would you do that, she is still crazy about and I know you still like her so why, what' he sounded aggravated and confused. 'I sent her up here so you to could get back together'

'Well you shouldn't have'

'Jess'

'No Luke, come on, don't do this'

'Fine whatever, I'm dropping it'

'Thank you, I'm going to bed'

'It's 9:00'

'Fine then I'm going to my room'

'I want you in the diner at 8:00'

'Okay'

He lay down on his bed. How could she still want him after all that happened? He closed his eyes. He could still taste her. He couldn't deny that he still wanted her, more then anything. But he couldn't, wouldn't give into himself. He needed for his own sake to stay away from her, romantically at least. He needed to get his life sorted out. He sighed and picked up a book, trying to concentrate on that instead of his own thoughts.

Don't you fret, Rory and Jess will be together, eventually. The next few chapters are basically fluff, but some good things happen in them. Well in my opinion good things happen, anyway hope you enjoyed this chapter.

Tegan


	14. Stupidest thing i've ever heard

The next morning he was down in the diner promptly at 8:00. Luke looked up as he entered. 'Your Up!'

'You said you needed me at 8 so here I am.'

'I know what I said, I just didn't think you'd be up.'

'So can I go back to bed and wait until the expected time you thought I'd be up?'

'No'

'Right'

'Clean that table up for me will you'

'Sure'

He worked all day long and was finally sitting down for a break around 5:00 when Lorelia came in.

'Luke fill me up!'

'You could try asking politely you know'

'I know, but where's the fun in that?'

'Of course' he looked around 'Where is Rory?'

'Oh, she said something about needing to do some work before break starts so she has more time to do something, I don't know I wasn't really paying attention'

'Good mother'

'Hey"

'Sorry, you are an excellent mother even though you tend to be caught up in your own doings occasionally'

Jess snorted at this and Lorelia threw him a glare, mind you it was an almost friendly glare. He went back to reading.

'Oh guess who called this morning!'

'Hartford Mental Institute they finally have a room available for you?'

'Hey I'm trying to be serious. No, Dean called'

'Really?'

Jess stopped reading and listened intently with his eyes still focused on his page.

'Yep, him and Mrs. Forrester are coming home for the holidays-'

'Whoa, Dean got married?' Jess laughed 'Who gets married at 18? Man I always thought he was wacked, but not enough to get married! Who's the poor girl he's got under his possession now? Oh don't tell me it's the Michelle Branch and Matchbox 20 fan' he just sat there laughing

'Her names Lindsey, and what's wrong with Matchbox 20?'

'Your kidding right?

'Yeah, the really do suck'

'Yes, yes they do'

'Any way like I was saying' she turned back to Luke.' They get in next week, and he wants to have dinner with Rory'

'Just them?'

'I don't know, she didn't say much, she doesn't seem to be in the best mood today'

'I wonder why that is' he shot a disgusted look at Jess. Who rolled his eyes and got up. 'I'm going out'

As he left her heard Lorelia ask 'What did he do? I swear if he hurt her I'm going to-.' The door closing cut off her sentence. He hoped that Luke had enough sense to not tell Lorelia. It wasn't his business to tell. Rory would probably get pretty pissed if Luke told her Mom what happened. He suddenly started to laugh, Dean getting married, that was the stupidest thing he had ever heard.

Okay I know short chapter, I just wanted to put a little dean in, basically cause I think that dean getting married is the stupidest thing ever, that was the worst way to write him off the show, I mean they could of sent him back to Chicago or something. This and the next couple of chapters are really just filler, before I can get back on to my original course. It is kind of difficult to write these chapters ,cause like I said I had already written future chapters, its hard to go back to the events leading up to them, so just bear with me for the next few chapters.

Tegan


	15. Friends?

A week passed. Rory had been in the diner a few times, but they seemed to be avoiding each other pretty well, so it wasn't that uncomfortable in the diner.

At the moment only Kirk was in the diner.

'Kirk would you just order'

'I need time'

'You've had 15 minutes, how much longer do you need?'

'I'm trying to decide on the soup or salad'

'Why not get both?'

'Both, that sounds good'

'Good' Luke turned around he looked like he was going to strangle Kirk. Jess held back a laugh.

'Actually'

'What Kirk'

'I think I would like a turkey sandwich. Lettuce and tomatoe and marble cheese make sure it's marble, no Mayo, but a little squirt of mustard.'

'Is that all?'

'For now'

Luke walked back to the counter, where Jess was laughing quietly. 

'You can deal with him next time'

Just then Lorelia walked into the diner and yelled out 'RORY!' Then looked around 'She's not here'

'Good observation'

'We were supposed to meet here 15 minutes ago, did she leave?'

'She was never here'

'Oh' she sat down at the counter. The door opened and Rory walked in.

'Where have you been, I've been sitting here for 15 minutes waiting for you. You better have a good reason for being late little missy!'

'Don't listen to her, she just got in now'

She gasped' Luke are you accusing me of lying to my own daughter, I'm insulted how dare you say that'

'I saw you come in Mom'

'Oh well, I was just trying to make you feel guilty'

'I know'

'Would it have worked?'

'Possibly'

'Good, so you're on break now?'

'If you call break two essays and a research paper, sure I'm on break'

'That much'

'Yep, but luckily this week I managed to get most of my research for my paper done, plus I have a rough draft for one of my essays.'

'How you escaped the procrastination gene I will never know'

'Are you two going to order?'

'Hello Luke'

'Hello Rory, are you going to order?'

'Burger, fries coffee'

'Me to'

'Jess go get that'

'Your closer to the kitchen'

'Jess'

'Fine'

Just then Kirk called from across the room. 'There is Mayo on my sandwich I specifically asked for no Mayo'

Luke looked panicked ' On second thoughts you go deal with Kirk I'll get this'

'But Uncle Luke, you can't just go changing your mind all the time and giving me different orders I may become confused, then what will I do?'

'Just go to Kirk'

'Whatever you say Luke'

He winked at Rory, then remembering that they were avoiding each other he quickly went over to Kirk. He could feel her eyes watching him, but he ignored it.

The next morning Rory and Lorelia were sitting at a table finishing breakfast and talking.

'So what are you doing today?'

'Umm probably going to work on my essay. Why?'

'Just thought if you needed a break you could come to the Inn and, well, help me work!'

'If I need a break I might stop by, but I'm not working'

'Ok well I got to go, so I'll see you later'

'Bye Mom'

Rory got up after her mom left and came up to the counter with her coffee cup.

'Jess' he looked up as she sat down

'Yeah'

'Friends?'

He smiled 'Friends' he poured her a refill and settled down to talk. 'So what book are you reading?'

She took a sip of her coffee, 'Well'

Okay more filler, there are two more chapters of basically filler, then I'm doing some important things!


	16. The Asshole

Jess was cleaning a table the next day when the bell above the door jingled. He glanced up and immediately tensed. Dean walked in with who Jess could only assume was his wife. He continued to clean off the table for a few more minutes.

'Excuse me, we'd like some service'

Jess glared at Dean. 'I'll be there in a minute'

'We've been sitting here for the last five minutes'

'I'll be there in a minute.' He brought the dishes around to the kitchen and walked back out to where Dean was sitting

'What can I get you'

'Burgers, fries and cokes'

'Burger, fries and cokes'

'Two of each'

'I got that thank you'

He walked away. How he hated Dean. But then he laughed to himself again; Dean was married, that was just too funny. He brought them their food and then went behind the counter and started to clean it. Rory came in and walked straight up to where he was. Jess realized that she hadn't seen Dean, but Dean had seen her and was glaring at them.

'Hey'

'Hey'

'Coffee, to go please'

He lowered his voice 'You aren't going to say Hi'

'I just said Hi'

'Not to me, to Mr. and Mrs. Forresster' he laughed a bit when he said that.

She turned and saw Dean and Lindsey 'Oh' She turned back to Jess, he had already poured her coffee into a mug. He was still laughing and she shot him a warning look, 'Be nice'

'Isn't that my trade mark?'

She walked over to Dean and Lindsey.

'Dean, hey I didn't see you, Hi Lindsey'

Dean stood up and hugged her. 'Oh, okay, uh, Hi.' She hugged him back awkwardly.

'I didn't think I would see you until Wednesday'

'Yeah well'

'Yeah'

'Do you want to sit?'

'Oh sure if it's okay'

'Sit'

She just smiled.

Jess tuned them out; he really didn't want to listen to them. He picked up his book and didn't look up until he heard the door open. He saw Lindsey leaving and frowned as he looked over at Dean and Rory. Dean was leaning casually backward; Rory on the other hand was sitting up straight in her seat and was fiddling with coffee mug. He caught a bit of their conversation but it was just about school, so he stopped listening again.

Half an hour later Rory got up and left, she waved at him, and he nodded. He didn't think that things could go back to being so comfortable around her after the kiss. He was surprised that she was so easy going around him. Maybe she understood that he had to figure things out. His thoughts were interrupted by Dean.

'See your still working here'

'Yep'

'Decided not to do anything with your life'

'Well you know that's me, but I got to say it sure beats marriage'

'Don't even start with-'

'What are you doing here?'

'I'm home for the-'

'At the counter, there is no need for you to be here. There is no need for us to have a conversation of any sorts, so whatever you are doing you can just stop and leave'

'Here's your money' he left

No tip, the asshole. He cleaned their table and smiled when he saw there was money on a napkin where Rory had been sitting. He pocketed it and continued working.

Okay I know. Short chapter, with not much happening. I just wanted a little Dean/Jess interaction to show that they still hate each other. I don't think there will be anymore, cause there's not going to be much more Dean. Either the next chapter or the one after that is where things will start to progress again.


	17. Awkward Diner

Saturday morning rolled around. Jess was woken up by Luke yelling at him to get downstairs. He slowly made his way down to the diner. It was packed. He smiled at Rory and Lorelia who were sitting at the counter. He went to take peoples orders.

The morning rush died down and there were only a few people left in the diner. He was able to sit behind the counter and read. But he found that he did little reading because he started to listen to the Gilmore's conversation. It seemed that Rory had gone out to dinner with Dean last night.

'Was it awkward?'

'Kind of, I mean we were friends before he left, and we've talked over the phone a few times but sitting there was different, you know? He was talking about the difficulties about being married, and I was like I only the know difficulties of being in collage and being away from home.'

'Yeah those may be a little different from his, ah, problems.'

'Really' she said sarcastically

'Well'

'I know.' There was a pause. 'I kind of did or said something that got him all mad'

'What would that be?'

'Well remember when he first told me he was getting married and I asked why? Well I sort of asked again, and he became all offended, so I tried to change the subject, but ended up picking another sore subject.'

'What could be sore-erer then that?'

'Sore-erer?'

'You know what I mean'

She whispered 'Jess'

'You didn't'

'I did'

'What did you say?'

'That he got his diploma, then Dean just looked at me like I was insane, so we just sat in uncomfortable silence for a while.'

'Sounds like it was a disaster'

'Yeah'

'Listen sweetie I got to get to work so I'll see you later for diner, Al's?'

'Sure, see you' Her mom left. 'Jess'

He jumped a bit when she called him, and looked up.

'Coffee'

'Coming right up' he pored her more coffee and leaned on the counter facing her at an angle. 'So how did dinner go?'

'How'd you know about that?'

'Heard you mom ask how did diner go with Dean last night'

'Did you here any more?' she sounded a little panicked so he lied.

'No'

'Okay'

'Are you going to answer my question or shall I just assume?'

'Oh it was fi-strange it was strange'

'How so?'

She sighed. 'I don't really know why he wanted to have dinner with me. Lindsey wasn't there, and it was just uncomfortable. I think he just wanted to show off how he was doing. It just seemed, I don't know, fake or something, do you understand?'

'Sure, he was just being the all to familiar egotistical, I'm better then you look at me asshole kind of-'

'Jess'

'Sorry, I get it'

'Mmhmm'

He smiled at her, and as he looked at her he caught himself wanting to kiss her and silently cursed himself for pushing her away. He quickly shook that thought out of his head. He had to stay strong. He wanted to get his life together. He knew it would take a while, and he had to be stable himself before he let someone he cared for back in, he wanted to make sure he wasn't going to push them away again. He realized that Rory was talking to him.

'Huh?'

'Were you listening?'

'I'd say yes, but then I'd be lying'

'Gee thanks'

'No problem, what were you saying?'

'Nothing important, it was just that I had to get going so I asked if I would see you later'

'Oh'

'So I'll see you later?'

'Yeah, of course I'll be here'

'Right' she looked a little disappointed, like she had wanted him to say something else. He watched her go. He sighed, just wait a while Rory, just wait until I find myself. He looked back at her coffee mug and picked it up and put it in the kitchen and then proceeded to clean the counter.


	18. It's to late

** I have decided to jump a few months ahead because it makes it easier for me to get back on to my original story plot. So this takes place a few months after the last chapter.**

He was doing better. He had to admit it. He had been thinking about his future and what he was going to do. He applied to a few state schools, even though it was late to apply he figured he would at least try. His marks had been nothing spectacular, but while in Venice he managed to bring his average up to 77%, so that was a great improvement. He even went back to Wal-Mart and got a reference from his old manager. He had submitted an essay, and a short story. The short story was what he was really proud of. It was sort of an autobiography, about a troubled kid who has no place and how he has tried to find it, and the fact that it came in the least likely of places. He had no idea what the outcome was going to be but at least he put himself out there.

He looked around town, it was late February, every thing was gray and dull and still bitterly cold. He wished he had brought his gloves with him. He stuffed his hands into his pockets, he was on his way back to the diner. He figured he would tell Rory tonight that he had applied to college. They had remained good friends, but he couldn't deny that he wanted more. Sometimes he caught her watching him and had the feeling that she still felt the same. He was finally at a point in his life that he felt like he was doing something. He wanted to tell her how he felt about her; maybe he would do it tonight when he told her what he had been doing these past few weeks.

About a month ago he suddenly realized that he had fallen in love. It came quite suddenly. They had just been talking and it came to him that the only reason he was trying to make something of himself was because of her. He wanted to be worth y in her eyes. He didn't want to be a complete failure. To be in love, or just to love was something new to him. He didn't love his mother, well he loved her in the you're my mother I have to love you even though I don't like you, type of way.

He walked into the diner and hung up his coat. He went behind the counter and started to clear it up. Lorelia was sitting at a table waiting for Rory he presumed. She often came home on the weekends. He went to get the order of a couple who were sitting at the table next to Lorelia, when Rory practically ran into the diner and sat down.

'Oh my god, okay, you remember I was telling you about that cute guy in my Lit class who I occasionally talk to?'

' David, yeah'

'Okay, well he asked me out!'

'Oh my god, college boy'

'I know'

'What are you going to wear?'

'I don't know that's where you come in'

'Oh I'm so excited'

'Me too'

Jess walked away very quickly, he saw Rory glance at him but then maybe he had just imagined it. He went into the storeroom and rested his head against the wall. She had a date. She had moved on. Isn't that what he had told her to do? He had been a fool to think she would wait for him. It figures that the one time he is in a good place and is ready, it is already too late. He laughed at himself and went back into the diner where he picked up the plates of food to be served.

So that wasn't a long chapter but now I'm building up the events that are to come later. I'm going to be super busy for a while cause I'm going away to my cottage and my cousin is coming in from Edmonton, so I don't know when I will update. Besides that I am using my brothers computer and he is moving so he is taking it with him. Good thing I just got my own computer but its not hooked up to the Internet yet so it will have to wait. I will probably get a few more posts up next week, but after that it may become kind of erratic. So sorry in advance!

Tegan


	19. A night out

He decided to go out that night. He had recently bought another car, so he thought he would go in to Hartford or something. He might wander around a few bookstores, get a few drinks, anything he didn't care, he just wanted out. He told Luke he was going out, and not to expect him back early. He felt bad for being rude to Luke, he shouldn't take it out on him, but he couldn't help it.

He found a place to park and got out. He looked around and saw a bookstore so he went in. He looked for a bit, but this was a new bookstore, he liked used bookstores, because all the books had a worn appeal to them, plus they were cheaper. He left in search for a used bookstore and found one a couple of blocks away, right next to a vintage record store. He smirked, he knew he would be here all night. 

He went into the bookstore first and spent about an hour and a half browsing. He picked up a copy of George Orwells Animal Farm and John Steinbecks The Pearl. He left and went next door. He was in there for about 40 minutes, when he reached for a CD at the same time someone else did. He looked up annoyed and stared into a pair of dark brown eyes. Her hair was long straight and black. He handed her the Distillers CD.

'I've already got this CD, but this one has a special edition song on it, but you can have it.'

'Thanks, Distillers fan huh'

'Oh yeah'

'I'm Rachel'

'Jess'

'Do you come here a lot?'

'Nope, first time'

'Oh, this place is great, I come here like three times a month, I just can't get enough'

'Huh, it seems pretty cool'

'You don't sound like you're from here, are you?'

'No, I used to live in New York, but I live in a small town about a half hour from here'

'Moved to be come a country boy?'

'No, got kicked out and sent to live with my uncle'

'Oh, sorry'

'Doesn't matter'

'Do you want to get a couple drinks or something?'

'Sure'

'Kay there's this great pub a couple blocks from here'

'Lead the way'

He hoped they didn't check for ID, he hadn't had his 19th birthday yet. /AN I don't know what the legal drinking age is there, but its 19 where I'm from, so that is what it is here to! /

She bought the CD and they left. They walked to the bar making small talk. She asked if he was in college.

'No, I applied a few weeks ago, I wanted to take a year or two off before I went.'

'Me too, I'm applying for the fall of next year, I just can't seem to get myself together to apply now. How old are you?'

'19' he figured he wouldn't lie too much. It was close enough to the truth he would be 19 in a couple of months. And it wasn't like it mattered what he told her.

'I just turned 20 last week'

'Happy belated birthday'

'Thanks, when is your birthday'

'July'

They arrived at the bar and sat down and ordered a couple of beers. Then a couple more, and a couple more. Before he knew it he was in her apartment taking off her clothes. He was kissing her neck when he heard her say 'Just so you know, I'm not looking for anything serious'

'Fine by me'

She took his shirt off, and they fell onto the bed. He imagined it was Rory underneath him the whole time.

He woke up with a killer headache. He looked over Rachel was still sleeping. He got up and went to the bathroom. When he came back she had sat up. He smiled at her and started to get dressed. 'I got to get to going, I have to work today'

She nodded, 'Listen, call me sometime' She handed him her number.

'I thought this was nothing serious'

'It's not, that was fun so I thought we could do it again if one of us ever wants to.' She smiled at him.

'Why not' he gave her his number. 'I gotta go'

'Bye Jess'

'See ya' he left and walked down the hall. 'Shit' he turned around and knocked on the door. She opened it.

'I don't have a clue to where I am, how do I get back to that record store?'

She laughed a bit, and gave him directions. 'Thanks'

'Bye'

He followed her directions and found his car. There was no ticket, which was lucky he thought. He got back to Luke's by 8:00. Luke looked pissed.

'I didn't mean to stay out all night, sorry' he took an Advil, Luke was still glaring at him.

'Where did you sleep?'

'My car, I couldn't exactly drive home'

'You're 18 Jess'

'Thanks I didn't know that Sorry, I had a bad day, had to get out'

'And get trashed'

'Something like that'

'Jess'

'Luke'

'This is about Rory isn't it'

'What about her'

'She's moving on, she's going out with some guy and you're all pissed because you let her get away'

'Luke don't start that, this has nothing to do with her'

'Sure'

'It doesn't'

'Whatever, just get to work'

He picked up a rag and started to wipe down the counter.

Like I said before I don't know when the next chapter will be up, I may get it up tomorrow, if not then I don't have a clue to when it will be up. So again sorry. I will try my hardest to post as often as I can.

Tegan


	20. sorry

Hi! Just wanted to let you know that I won't be able to post for another week. I know I could have posted today since I am writing something now, but I wrote a few chapters and realized that I didn't like where they were going so now I have to go back and write some more and figure out what is going to happen. I'm going to my cottage until Thursday so I will probably update then or on Friday. Sorry about the wait, its frustrating me cause I have a bad case of writers block and I like to post often, cause it gives me satisfaction, but now I'm stuck so what can you do right. All right that's all I wanted to say, so bye

Tegan


	21. You've got mail

Okay, sorry I haven't been able to post in a while, been away, and I'm going away again for another couple of weeks, so I probably wont post again for a while, sorry. Ummm this chapter is a couple months after the last two chapters. Basically the last two chapters were just to give some background information before these chapters. I finally feel like I'm back on the way I want this story to go. So like I said it's a couple months in the future, early may. So here's the chapter.

It was completely dead. He had served only one customer in over three hours. Luke had gone to Hartford for some things and left him in charge. So there he was, sitting behind the counter, his head resting in his hand, a discarded book lying a few feet down the counter. He had finished it about an hour ago and was to bored or lazy to get another one. So he just sat. Suddenly the door opened and he jumped up ready to serve. It was only Luke. He slumped back down.

Luke raised an eyebrow at him 'Slow?'

'You noticed, in the past three hours want to know how many people have come in? One. Just one.'

'It'll pick up for the diner rush, not only that but Lorelia and Rory should be coming in soon. Today is the day Rory comes home right?'

'Yeah I think so'

Ha he thinks so. He knows so. He had been waiting for this day to come ever since he found out when she would be home.

'So' Luke interrupted his thoughts 'I went to the post office and there was mail there-'

'Oh my god mail, are you serious, I wouldn't have guessed there would be mail at the post office, unless of course I knew that the post office is where mail is usually found'

'Shut up, I don't need any of your sarcastic remarks'

'Nothing else to do'

'Well do something then, read clean the counter or tables, or go out'

'Fine, see ya'

'Where are you going"

'You said I could go out'

'Well I didn't mean it, come back here I need to talk to you'

He walked back to the counter.

'Like I was saying I went to the post office and there was mail, for you'

'Can I have it?'

'Two letters, one from Hartford Community College, and one from Connecticut State. Jess did you apply to college?'

'Can I have my letters'

'Answer the question first'

Luke held the letters back; Jess bit his lip and glared at Luke 'Yes'

Luke grinned 'Why didn't you tell me?'

'Wanted to find out the outcome before I told anyone. Now can I have my letters?'

Luke handed them to him. He slipped them in his pocket.

'What are you doing? Open them'

'Not right now'

'What do you mean not right now? Don't you want to see what they say?'

'Yes, but I don't need you hovering and bouncing around me when I open them'

'I'm not bouncing'

'Yes you are'

Luke suddenly looked stern. 'I order you to open those letters'

'You can't order me to open them'

'I'm your guardian'

'Yeah, my guardian, but considering I'm eighteen, an adult, I don't have to do what you say'

'Jess open the damn letters'

'No'

Luke jumped on him; he was trying to wrestle him to the ground. Neither heard the door open. Luke had Jess' arm pinned behind his back and was reaching with the other. 'Give me the letters'

'Get off me you nut job, there MY letters'

Someone coughed. Luke let go of Jess. Jess straightened his shirt and looked at the door.

'What the hell was that' Lorelia asked. Rory just laughed.

Luke spoke first 'Jess wont open his-'

'Luke' he was glaring at him 'shut up'

'What? Come on Jess, they're going to find out anyway'

'So what, let them find out when I want them to'

'Find out what?'

Luke opened his mouth, Jess glared, and Luke looked like he was having an internal struggle. 'Oh fine' he looked at Rory and Lorelia 'Never mind' he looked at Jess 'Your insane'

'No I think you were the one who just demonstrated that particular quality by jumping me, I'm going out, be back in a bit'

He made his way to the bridge and sat down. He pulled the letters out of his pocket and stared at them. He had been there less then five minutes when he heard footsteps. He looked up smirked and shook his head.

'Luke sent you did he'

'No'

He raised his eyebrows 'Really?'

'No'

'Did he tell you?'

'No he just said go after him, see if he'll talk. He told me I'd be surprised, and I must say after the little scene earlier I am curious about what s going on.'

She looked at him expectantly

'Well you'll just have to wait, go back to the diner, tell Luke I wouldn't talk'

She looked at him with disappointed eyes. She stood up quickly 'Fine' she snapped and marched off the bridge.

'Welcome home' he called after her.

She turned and smiled he smirked. 

He looked back at the letters. He opened the Hartford one first. It was his back up incase he didn't get into Connecticut. He read the letter and smiled a bit. He got in there. He then opened Connecticut State. He looked up suddenly with a grin on his face. He looked around. He was in. he felt a flash of disappointment that no one was there with him, but he shook it off. He put the letters back in their envelope and walked back to the diner.

The diner was busy now. He walked in. Lorelia and Rory were sitting at the counter. Luke was in front of them talking. Jess walked behind them. He could feel all of their eyes watching him. He put he letters on the counter nodded at Luke and went to serve a customer.

He glanced up a minute later and saw Luke reading the letters, absolutely grinning. Luke looked at him and started to walk over. Jess realized what he was going to do. He put his arm out and proclaimed 'No you don't I don't need a show of affection'

'Yes you do, Jess this is, this is' he struggled for a word 'Huge, its huge'

'It's not huge, I don't need a big fuss'

Lorelia yelled from across the room 'Awww Jessie of course you need a fuss, it's HUGE' She threw her arms up for dramatic effect. He glared at her; some of the customers were watching them intently. He walked back to the counter, side stepping Luke.

Jess glanced at Rory who caught his hand with hers.

'It's great Jess, I knew you could do it, congratulations' she smiled at him.

'Thanks' he smiled back.

They both stayed in that position, Rory sitting holding his hand across the counter and he leaning on it, both staring at each other, until Luke patted him on the back causing them to snap out of the world they had been in.

Okay so there it was, I'm going to try to write a few more chapters today and maybe they will be posted today or tomorrow, no guarantees but I'll try. 

Tegan


	22. Something Stupid

Okay so I managed to get another chapter done so here it is. Some major R/J stuff!!!

A few days had passed since he got his acceptance letters. He was sitting on a bench in the park by the gazebo. He was reading On the Road again. He looked up as he felt someone stop in front of him.

'Hey'

'Hey, don't you look swell' he looked her up and down, she was wearing jeans that had holes in them and a T-shirt that was at least three sizes to big.

'Shut up, I didn't want to dress up today, because I'm going out tonight'

'Oh, so you did the whole look unattractive during the day so when you get ready tonight you will feel better about yourself cause you look better then you did during the day'

'Something like that. Do I really look that bad'

He looked at her again. 'No you look fine, clothes don't matter all that much'

'Oh, can I sit?'

'Yeah'

They sat in silence for a few minutes, he was about to ask her if she wanted something when she spoke again.

'Why didn't you tell me?'

He was lost, tell her what?

'Your going to have to be more specific'

'That you applied to college, why didn't you tell me?'

He thought back, cause you got a date, he couldn't tell her that. 'Just wanted to know what was going to happen before I told anyone'

'Oh'

They sat in silence again. 'So On the Road again huh, how's that going at the moment?'

'It's fine'

'Care to elaborate?'

He started a detailed description of what was happening. They moved on to talk about her current books. A couple of hours passed and she was talking about school when she glanced at her watch. 'Oh shit' she jumped up.

'Profanity, don't often hear that from you'

'I gotta go, I'm going to be late, I'm supposed to meet David in like half an hour and I have to drive into Hartford, I can't believe this'

She started to run. He called to her.

'Your house is the other way'

'I can't go to my house I have to go meet David'

'Like that'

She looked at what she was wearing.

'Listen I don't think David will mind if you're a little late, I think he would mind if you showed up in that though. It looks like you didn't care about seeing him'

'I thought you said clothes don't matter'

'they don't, to me, I know you well enough to not really care what you are wearing, but I think he would care'

'Right, okay, got to go change, how did this happen, I'll just have to tell him why I'm late'

'Your going to tell him the truth?'

'Yeah'

'Really, sorry I'm late David, but see I was talking to another guy all afternoon and lost track of time, that's going to go over so well'

'Shit' 

He laughed 'Go on, go change'

'Right, thanks Jess'

'No problem'

He sat back down on the bench and tried to continue to read, however he stopped and sighed, and just stared at his book.

A couple hours later he walked out of the diner after closing it up. He started to turn left but saw Rory walking with her head down toward him so he went up to meet her. He wasn't sure why she was home, it was only 9:00, and she left just after 7.

'Your home early'

She glanced up and he saw that she was or had been crying.

'Oh god Rory, what's the matter?'

'Am I really that naïve, I mean am I missing something or doing something wrong'

'What are you talking about'

'Is there a point in a relationship that you're expected to put out or get dumped'

'What. No Rory'

'I just don't get it, I mean there was Dean, we never did anything cause I figured I was to young and wasn't ready. Then there was you, and I actually thought I was ready, and probably would've if you hadn't left. I thought David was different, I just wasn't that comfortable with him yet, now I don't even have the chance'

'Listen Rory, David doesn't deserve you if he broke up with you over sex, the guy is obviously a loser don't worry about it, you did nothing wrong, you have to be ready, no matter what'

'Thanks'

He nodded. He was still in a bit of shock. She just told him she would've slept with him if he hadn't left. That one night at that party when they were up in that bedroom, she had said something like you didn't expect it to happen like that, so maybe he already knew that she would've. He had been such a jerk that night. Rory said something and he snapped out of his memory.

'Do you want to go do something'

'Like what?'

'I don't know something stupid'

'In that case no'

'Come on, I just want to get this off my mind'

'How stupid are we talking'

'I don't know'

'We could vandalize public property, be disruptive in town and wake people up, we could get drunk, we could-'

'Get drunk'

'You serious'

'Yep'

He looked at her skeptically

'I have been drunk before you know, come on Jess'

'I don't know'

'Jess are you seriously saying no, I never thought I would be the one pressuring you into drinking'

'Fine hold on I'll go back to Luke's'

'Why?'

'To get my stash'

'You have a stash?'

He just smirked at her. He came back out with a couple of beers and Loaded Sodas and some Mikes Hard. 'Where shall we go?'

'To the bridge'

'It's not safe to drink around water'

'So we'll sit on the bank, no one will be down there at this time, it's the most private place in Stars Hollow'

'Okay' He led the way to the bridge. He sat down against a tree and she sat down next to him. He pulled the bottles out of his backpack.

'Whoa, that's a lot of alcohol'

'Didn't know how much to bring, what do you want?'

'Mikes'

An hour later she was totally plastered. She had one Mikes and two Loaded Sodas, both have like 7.5% alcohol, so she was pretty drunk. He had only had one beer, he didn't really want to get drunk, he was just watching her. She was rambling on about something but he had no clue what it was.

Another hour and a half passed and Rory was calming down. She looked at him curiously for a minute. 'How many people have you slept with'

'What'

'I want to know'

'Why'

'I want to know what they had that I don't'

'You can't be serious'

But to prove him wrong she climbed on top of him so she was straddling him. She kissed him. When he tried to tell her to stop she took the opportunity of his mouth being open to slide her tongue in, and all his efforts stopped. He gave in to her touch. His hands found their way to her hips, he pressed her closer to him. She found the bottom of his shirt and started to lift it over his head. The kiss broke for a second, but started again with more desperation from both sides. She stopped suddenly and lifted her shirt over her head. He shuddered as he looked at her. She kissed him again. Her hands were running all over his body. He brought his hands up to her hair and ran his fingers through it. It was only when he felt her start undoing his belt and pants that he managed to stop himself and her.

'Rory, come on, stop, we can't do this, your upset and drunk you don't know what your doing'

She laughed, but it wasn't a happy laugh, 'Your wrong' she put her shirt on and walked away. It was a while before he himself put his shirt back on and cleaned up the grass and went back to the diner.

Okay, so do you like? That's all for now, I may be able to post tomorrow, but I don't know, so I will leave you with this. Are they going to get together now, or will they act like it never happened? Please review I like hearing what you guys think!!

Tegan


	23. At home

Okay, I'm sooooooooooooo sorry that I haven't updated for like three weeks. I was at my cottage for a couple of weeks and when I came back my brother had moved out and taken his computer with him. And you see I used his computer so we had to set ours up and then we were having problems with the internet and we finally got it working, and I have just had time now to sit down and finish this story, cause I started back at school and its been totally hectic. Right so this is the last chapter I'm so glad that it's done because I just wanted to finish it and I couldn't because of all the above problems. So without any further ado here is the last chapter of Jess Returns.  
  
He woke up the next morning and the events of the previous night came back to him in a rush. He was going to have to talk to her, but he wasn't sure how to bring it up. He made his way slowly into the diner, afraid that she might be there. Fortunately she wasn't. He worked quietly without a break until one o' clock, when he told Luke he was going out. He didn't reply when Luke asked him how long he would be. He wasn't sure how it would go. He walked slowly up her driveway, still not sure of what to say. He knocked on her door. It was a minute before she answered. When she saw him she gasped and slammed the door in his face. He rolled his eyes and knocked again. 'Rory, I know you're standing there. Open the door, we need to talk' she didn't answer. 'Fine I will talk, right here, don't get upset if the neigbours hear me though it's not my problem if they do. So about last night-' She opened the door and stepped back to let him in. He brushed past her and into the living room. He turned to look at her and noticed she was hovering near the door. She came in and stood as far away as possible from him. He broke the silence. 'Should I go, or will you?' 'Me' She didn't say anything; he was just about to prompt her when she started to speak. 'I was drunk, I didn't know what I was doing, I was upset and confused and angry and hurt and I took it out on you and I am really sorry it was all just one big mistake I never meant for that to happen. It didn't mean anything.' He frowned. She was lying through her teeth. 'Last night you seemed to deny those exact explanations that I gave to you' She looked shocked 'Of course I did, I was drunk' She fumbled for words as she said that. He wasn't going to stand around and listen to her lies. So he headed for the door. He was upset that she was denying it, that she was denying the fact that she still liked him. As he opened the door he called out one last thing to her. 'You know, when you're drunk you can let your innermost desires and thought take over, sometimes you do things that you wish you could do when you are sober but have never had the guts' He closed the door. He walked back to the diner. The sky looked like he felt. Storm clouds were brewing, it would rain tonight. He worked the rest of the afternoon and offered to close up for Luke. It was nine o'clock when Luke went upstairs. Jess had been right about the rain. It was coming down so hard now that you couldn't see a thing outside. There were a few flashes of lightning now and then and thunder that shook the buildings. He was cleaning off a table when the bell jingled. He turned annoyed and was just about to tell the person off when he saw her. She was soaked right through, dripping everywhere. She was fiddling with her hands and was again looking everywhere but at him. He didn't say anything because it looked as though she wanted to talk. So he waited. She still wasn't looking at him when she spoke. 'It wasn't the alcohol that made me kiss you, I've, I wanted to, to do that for a long time. I don't think I ever truly got over you, I know I never got over you' She looked at him. 'I love you' He crossed the room in a couple of steps and took her face in his hands and kissed her. He kissed her like he had never kissed anyone before. When they broke apart he whispered into her mouth 'I don't think I have ever loved someone as much as I love you' She kissed him again, and he felt himself fall into her. He knew that it would all be okay. He had her; he was going to school in the fall, this time it would all work out. He finally felt at home.  
  
Okay so that is it. I just want to thank you all for reviewing it was great to have people read something of my imagination and actually like it, so thanks. Hope you like the ending, and the whole thing. So that's all for now, I have other story ideas but I don't know if I will end up writing them because of school and such, but I might! So again thanks for reading! ~ Tegan~ 


End file.
